This post is motivated by the The 7 habits of highly effective people. This is an absolutely amazing book that I am sure to read over and over again. I have not finished reading the book yet, but there is a principle that I have just read that really resonated with me, and it was something I was struggling to apply earlier today. It is understanding what is and is NOT in your scope of control, and ONLY focusing on what is in your control that is aligned with your values. This may seem overly simplistic but do not make mistake simplicity for ineffectiveness. Knowledge is NOT sufficient to make sure you act on it. Realize that common knowledge is NOT common action.
As the picture above depicts, they are only two things in your life: things you control and those that you cannot control. The vast majority of athletes are worried about winning the next game, play-off series, league championship etc. These things are all things we do NOT control. However, we do not focus enough of our attention, on our training, diet, sleeping, and mental preparation which reflect our deeper values. This is not some platitude love the process, and the results will come. Sayings like this indicate one has not realized the true essence of this simple but profound statement.
You complete the task, prepare, sacrifice purely for the opportunity to complete the task with absolutely NO expectation about the result. You do NOT stay in the gym and put up extra shots up, so that you can score more points on game day. You do it because it is who you are, and what you represent You could end up shooting worse the next game because your legs are tired. But that does NOT matter, because it is something you do NOT control.
This is an extremely liberating view, that instantly helps eases your anxiety. It helps you really become grounded with who you are, and realize that there is nothing life can throw at you that you can not handle because you know who you are and what you stand for and will act accordingly.
This is all great, but it is still a very abstract concept. How can YOU take this powerful concept and apply it to your life. I will give you an example that hopefully helps clarify about how you can apply this to your life. Upon introspection I have realized that recently I am not being the best son and brother I can be. Family is something that is super important to me, but I have not been devoting enough time to because I have been “busy”. So I decided I need to focus on what I CAN control to turn this situation around. I have decided that I will:
1. Greet ever family member with a huge smile whenever they come home (or I come home) and take at least 20-30 seconds to ask them how there day went AND to Listen.
2. Actively go out of my way to do 1-2 random unexpected acts of kindness to brighten up their days.
3. Ensure that I do NOT look at my phone and I am entirely present while talking to them.
I hope this article gave you some inspiration to make changes now to support you in becoming the best you can be. Blogs such as these are much more fun and helpful if there is interaction. So please always feel free to reach out to me on facebook or linkedIn (Pavan Mehat) or shoot me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org.